Albert Barnes Commentary 1 Timothy 5:4

"But if any widow hath children or grandchildren, let them learn first to show piety towards their own family, and to requite their parents: for this is acceptable in the sight of God." — 1 Timothy 5:4 (ASV)

But if any widow have children. This refers to children who would be dependent on her care and who might themselves contribute to her support.

Or nephews. The word "nephew" now commonly means the son of a brother or sister. Formerly, the English word also meant grandchildren or descendants of any description (Webster). The Greek word used here, ekgona, has the latter meaning. It denotes those sprung from or born of, and thus descendants of any kind—sons, daughters, grandchildren. The Greek word would not, in fact, properly include nephews and nieces; it embraces only those in a direct line.

Let them learn first to show piety at home (with a marginal note suggesting "or kindness"). This means that the children and grandchildren should learn to do this. They should have an opportunity to perform their duty towards their aged parent or grandparent. Such a widow should not be taken in among the poor and dependent women of the church to be maintained at public expense; rather, her children should support her. In this way, they will have an opportunity to demonstrate Christian kindness and to repay her for her care.

The apostle calls this "showing piety" (eusebein)—that is, filial piety, which is piety towards a parent demonstrated by providing for that parent's needs in old age. The word "piety" is commonly used to denote piety towards God, but it is also used to denote proper reverence and respect for a parent (Robinson).

And to requite their parents. This means to repay them, as far as possible, for all their kindness. This debt can never be wholly repaid, but a child should still feel it a matter of sacred obligation to do as much towards it as possible.

For that is good and acceptable before God. It is a duty everywhere enjoined (compare Matthew 15:5-7 and Ephesians 6:1-2; see also Barnes' commentary on these passages).