John Calvin Commentary 2 Corinthians 7:3

"I say it not to condemn [you]: for I have said before, that ye are in our hearts to die together and live together." — 2 Corinthians 7:3 (ASV)

I say not this to condemn you. As the previous apology was a kind of expostulation, and we can scarcely avoid reproaching when we expostulate, he therefore softens what he had said. “I clear myself,” he says, “in such a way as to desire to avoid what would tend to your dishonor.” The Corinthians, it is true, were unkind, and they deserved that, on Paul’s being acquitted from blame, they should be substituted in his place as the guilty party; furthermore, that they should be held guilty in two respects—for ingratitude, and for having slandered the innocent. Such, however, is the Apostle’s moderation that he refrains from recrimination, contenting himself with simply standing on the defensive.

For I have before said. Those who love do not attack; indeed, if any fault has been committed, they either overlook it or soften it by kindness. For a disposition to reproach is a sign of hatred. Hence Paul, to show that he has no inclination to distress the Corinthians, declares his affection towards them. At the same time, he undoubtedly, in a way, condemns them, even while saying that he does not do so. However, just as there is a great difference between gall and vinegar, so there is also between the condemnation by which we harass a man in a spirit of hatred, with the intention of blasting him with infamy, and, on the other hand, that by which we endeavor to bring an offender back to the right way, so that, along with safety, he may also regain his honors unimpaired.

Ye are in our hearts—that is, “I carry you about with me enclosed in my heart.” To die and live with you—that is, “So that no change can loosen our attachment, for I am prepared not merely to live with you, but also to be associated with you in death, if necessary, and to endure anything rather than renounce your friendship.” Note well how all pastors ought to be disposed.