John Calvin Commentary Genesis 38:20

"And Judah sent the kid of the goats by the hand of his friend the Adullamite, to receive the pledge from the woman`s hand: but he found her not." — Genesis 38:20 (ASV)

And Judah sent the kid. He sends by the hand of a friend, so that he might not reveal his disgrace to a stranger. This is also the reason why he does not dare to complain of the lost pledges, to avoid exposing himself to ridicule. For I do not approve the interpretation some give to the words, Let her take it to her, lest we be shamed, as if Judah would excuse himself, as if he had fulfilled the promise he had made.

Another meaning is far more suitable: namely, that Judah would rather lose the ring than, by spreading the matter further, give rise to common gossip, because the loss of money is lighter than the loss of character. He might also fear being exposed to ridicule for having been so credulous. But he was chiefly afraid of the disgrace arising from his fornication.

Here we see that men who are not governed by the Spirit of God are always more concerned about the opinion of the world than about the judgment of God. For why, when the lust of the flesh excited him, did it not come into his mind, “Now I will become vile in the sight of God and of angels?” Why, at least, after his lust had cooled, does he not blush at the secret knowledge of his sin? But he is secure, if only he can protect himself from public disgrace.

This passage, however, teaches what I have said before: that fornication is condemned by the common sense of men, so that no one might seek to excuse himself on the ground of ignorance.