John Gill Commentary Ephesians 6

Children, obey your parents in the Lord
The persons whose duty this is, "children", are such of every sex, male and female, and of every age, and of every state and condition; and though the true, legitimate, and immediate offspring of men may be chiefly respected, yet not exclusive of spurious children, and adopted ones, and of children-in-law; and the persons to whom obedience from them is due, are not only real and immediate parents, both father and mother, but such who are in the room of parents, as step-fathers, step-mothers, guardians, nurses and all who are in the ascending line, as grandfathers, grandmothers.

To these, children should be subject and obedient in all things lawful, just, and good; in everything that is not sinful and unlawful, by the word of God; and in things indifferent, as much as in them lies, and even in things which are difficult to perform.

And this obedience should be hearty and sincere, and not merely verbal, and in show and appearance, nor mercenary; and should be joined with gratitude and thankfulness for past favours.

And it should be "in the Lord"; which may be considered either as a limitation of the obedience, that it should be in things that are agreeable to the mind and will of the Lord; or as an argument to it, because it is the command of the Lord, and is wellpleasing in his sight, and makes for his glory, and therefore should be done for his sake:

for this is right ;
it appears to be right by the light of nature, by which the very Heathens have taught it; and it is equitable from reason that so it should be; and it is just by the law of God, which commands nothing but what is holy, just, and good.

Honour thy father and mother
This explains who parents are, and points at some branches of obedience due to them; for they are not only to be loved, and to be feared, and reverenced, their corrections to be submitted to, offences against them to be acknowledged, their tempers to be borne with, and their infirmities covered;

but they are to be honoured in thought, word, and gesture; they are to be highly thought of and esteemed; they are to be spoken to, and of, very honourably, and with great veneration, and to be behaved to in a very respectful manner; and they are to be relieved, assisted, and maintained in a comfortable way when aged, and in necessitous circumstances; and which may be chiefly designed.

So the Jews explain (dwbk) , "the honour" due to parents, by (lykam) , "giving them food, drink", and "clothing", unloosing their shoes, and leading them out and in ^F24 . Compare with this (1 Timothy 5:4 1 Timothy 5:17) ; (See Gill on Matthew 15:4);

which is the first commandment with promise :
it is the fifth commandment in the decalogue, but the first that has a promise annexed to it: it is reckoned by the Jews ^F25 the weightiest of the weightiest commands of the law; and the reward bestowed on it, is length of days, as follows.

FOOTNOTES:

• F24: T. Hieros. Kiddushin, fol. 61. 2. T. Bab. Kiddushin, fol. 31. 1, 2. Maimon. & Bartenora in Misn. Kiddushin, c. 1. sect. 7.
• F25: Debarim Rabba, sect. 6. fol. 241. 3.

That it may be well with you
In this world, and that which is to come; see (Deuteronomy 5:16) . The Jews ^F26 say, ``there are four things, which if a man does, he eats the fruit of them in this world, and the capital part remains for him in the world to come; and they are these, (Maw ba) (dwbyk) ; "honouring father and mother", doing acts of beneficence, making peace between a man and his neighbour, and learning of the law, which answers to them all.''

And thou mayest live long on the earth :
length of days is in itself a blessing; and though men's days cannot be lengthened beyond God's purpose and decree; and though obedient children do not always live long; yet disobedience to parents often brings the judgments of God on children, so that they die not a common death, (2 Samuel 18:14) (Proverbs 30:17) . On those words in (Deuteronomy 32:47) , the Jews ^F1 have this paraphrase; ``because it is your life, (Maw ba) (dwbyk) , "this is honouring father and mother; and through this thing you shall prolong your days", this is beneficence.''

It may be observed, that the words in this promissory part are not the same as in the decalogue, where they stand thus, "that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God giveth thee", (Exodus 20:12) , referring to the land of Canaan; for the law in the form of it, in which it was delivered by Moses, only concerned the people of the Jews; wherefore to suit this law, and the promise of it, to others, the apostle alters the language of it.

FOOTNOTES:

• F26: Misna Peah, c. 1. sect. 1. T. Bab. Sabbat, fol. 127. 1, & Kiddushin, fol. 40. 1.
• F1: T. Hieros. Peah, fol. 15. 4.

And you fathers, provoke not your children to wrath
Neither by words; by unjust and, unreasonable commands; by contumelious and reproachful language; by frequent and public chidings, and by indiscreet and passionate expressions: nor by deeds; preferring one to another; by denying them the necessaries of life; by not allowing them proper recreation; by severe and cruel blows, and inhuman usage; by not giving them suitable education; by an improper disposal of them in marriage; and by profusely spending their estates, and leaving nothing to them.

Not but that parents may, and ought to correct and rebuke their children; nor are they accountable to them for their conduct; yet they should take care not to provoke them to wrath, because this alienates their minds from them, and renders their instructions and corrections useless, and puts them upon sinful practices; wrath lets in Satan, and leads to sin against God; and indeed it is difficult in the best of men to be angry and not sin; see (Colossians 3:21) . Fathers are particularly mentioned, they being the heads of families, and are apt to be too severe, as mothers too indulgent.

But bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord ;
instructing them in the knowledge of divine things, setting them good examples, taking care to prevent their falling into bad company, praying with them, and for them, bringing them into the house of God, under the means of grace, to attend public worship; all which, under a divine blessing, may be very useful to them; the example of Abraham is worthy of imitation, (Genesis 18:19) , and the advice of the wise man deserves attention, (Proverbs 22:6) .

Servants, be obedient to them that are [your] masters
The apostle enlarges on the duty of servants, as well as frequently inculcates it in his epistles; because, generally speaking, they were more rude and ignorant, and less pains was taken with them to instruct them; they were apt to be impatient and weary of the yoke; and scandal was like to arise from servants in the first ages of Christianity through some libertines, and the licentiousness of the false teachers, who insinuated, that servitude was inconsistent with Christian freedom.

The persons exhorted are "servants", bond servants, and hired servants; who are to be subject to, and obey their "masters", of each sex, whether male or female, of every condition, whether poor or rich, believers or unbelievers, good or bad humoured, gentle or froward: such as are their masters

according to the flesh ;
or "carnal masters", as the Vulgate Latin version renders it; even though they are unregenerate men, and are in a state of nature, and only mind the things of the flesh, yet they are to be obeyed in their lawful commands; or "in things pertaining to the flesh", as the Arabic version renders it; in things temporal, which concern the body, and this temporal life; not in things spiritual and religious, or that belong to conscience, and which are contrary to them: or "according to your flesh", as the Ethiopic version renders it; signifying that they are only masters over their bodies, not their consciences; and that their power only extends to corporeal things, and can last no longer than while they are in the flesh; see (Job 3:19) ; and obedience is to be yielded to them

with fear and trembling ;
with great humility and respect, with reverence of them, and giving honour to them, with carefulness not to offend them, with submission to their reproofs and corrections, and with fear of punishment; but more especially with the fear of God, being by that influenced and constrained to obedience;

in singleness of heart ;
with readiness and cheerfulness, without hypocrisy and dissimulation, and with all integrity and faithfulness:

as unto Christ ;
it being agreeable to his will, and what makes for his glory, and serves to adorn the doctrine of God our Saviour in all things.